I’m coming out.


Today (10.11.12) has been named “National Coming Out Day.” And I think it’s time I came out.

It’s time I came out as a straight man who supports the rights of my gay brothers and sisters to enjoy the same rights as I do.

It’s time I came out as a friend to publically support people I know who have been mistreated, misunderstood and misjudged.

It’s time I came out as a father who wants to raise his kids to follow the example of Jesus in the way we love and accept people.

It’s time I came out as a committed Christian who thinks the church should stand up for anyone who has been excluded, to embrace anyone who has been cast aside, to live like we believe Jesus meant what he said when he told us to love everyone.

It’s time to take a stand for the separation of church and hate. It’s time for the church to put its money where its mouth is. To drop our disingenuous platitudes like “Love the sinner, hate the sin,” and “God loves you just as you are, but he loves you too much to leave you that way”…all those little bumper sticker sayings that just drip with superiority and judgement. To remember that Jesus’ harshest words were directed at all the people who assumed they were right, that they had some exclusive access to the truth, and that they had a right and responsibility to judge everyone who didn’t measure up to their warped interpretations.

To confess that we have the blood of children on our hands, children who couldn’t face another day of torment, children who couldn’t find sanctuary in the very place that should have offered comfort and safety.

I’ve searched the Bible. I’ve read all the passages that are used to condemn, judge and marginalize homosexuals. I’ve studied the cultural contexts. I’ve looked behind the text, not just on the surface.

I’ve also studied the rest of the scriptures. The ones that say not to condemn, judge or marginalize. The ones that fill in all the gaps around all the “issues” with the overwhelming message that God loves people. All people. Equally. Period.

I know all the arguments. The accusations that you can’t just take the parts of the Bible you like and ignore the ones you don’t. And I agree. And it goes both ways.

There’s plenty of time and space to discuss and debate the proof-texting, the exegesis, the complexity of contextual nuances. But for today, there’s one clear message:

They will know we are Christians by our love.

Our extravagent, unconditional, unfettered, extreme, radical love.

He has showed you, O man, what is good.
    And what does the Lord require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
    and to walk humbly with your God. (Micah 6:8)

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4 thoughts on “I’m coming out.

  1. Compromising beliefs is always an interesting sight.

    There is a natural disconnect between personal morals and governmental rights. Everyone that seeks to make a claim to ‘rights’ has to connect these two things in some way. You’ve connected it by saying, “Ohp, well I can’t tell other people what to do because it’s a free country and laws and governmental rights aren’t based off of moral law,” but besides the second part being blatantly untrue, the topic of homosexual marriage as it relates to law has nothing to do with telling other people what to do. It has everything to do with the definition of a term and custom, which some cultures (namely the Christian one that you claim) see as ordained by God. Here is a list of religions that view marriage as between a man and a woman as ordained by God(s) or just moral law: Christianity, Islam, Judiasm, Buddhism, Sikh, Hinduism, Bahai, Druze, Zoroastrianism, and most others. It is a much smaller list (in names and population) that believes Homosexual marriage to be okay: the church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, New Age movement, Secular Humanism (Atheism), and individuals on the first list that succumb to pressures that reject their own moral law. But you and I would be hard-pressed to find a single religion that says that homosexual marriage is not just okay, but righteous and the best. You might accept homosexual marriage, but is it more than something that you can just tolerate? Should not in Christianity we ask ourselves if what we are doing is glorifying the Lord and righteous in His eyes and not just if what he would cede is okay? The Truth is the Lord does not see things as ‘sin’ and ‘not sin.’ He sees things is ‘righteous’ and ‘unrighteous.’ So when you are arguing for homosexuality (and I know that you are arguing for homosexual ‘rights’ which I will get to in a minute), as a Christian, you are not arguing for why it is okay, you are arguing for why it is righteous.

    But now that it is clear that homosexual marriage seems like the best option to almost no organized moral system, you have to be arguing (when arguing for homosexual ‘rights’) why even one person should have to tolerate their government redefining his or her sacred religious custom, let alone the millions in America that would have to tolerate it.

    The truth is that the only actually fair way of solving this issue is making sure government has nothing to do with the sacred-to-many, religious term “marriage.” It’s all or nothing and since there is no ‘all’ option in which those for and against gay marriage are satisfied, the only viable option is nothing.

    P.S. the only ‘right’ that anyone can argue for for homosexuals is ‘marriage,’ which even then is not a human right. And *even then* there are civil unions. Not one other thing beside marriage is denied to a homosexual person. So you are not arguing for gay rights, you are arguing for gay marriage. But using the word “rights” does make your argument sound better.

    • Valley Malachi,
      I saw no mention, or any implication being made in the blog regarding governmental rights, nor any mention of any kind toward “moral law”. Where did you see those points being made in the original blog?

  2. A fantastic, well-written post, in favour of true tolerance and a powerful statement of truly Christian beliefs. I like the fact that you have already the best reply to pharisees like Valley Malachi Scharping: “Jesus’ harshest words were directed at all the people who assumed they were right, that they had some exclusive access to the truth, and that they had a right and responsibility to judge everyone who didn’t measure up to their warped interpretations.” It is good to know there are people like you out there.

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